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If I tried to pick up a lady at the bar I would crash and burn worse then the first fight of a military aircraft. My hands sweat, I turn beet red, and I sound like Porky Pig (no offense Porky). The recollections of past date that I am about to tell you are true. None of this is made up. I just hope that you laugh as much as I do when I remember the fond memories that I have of my personal life. I was going to this gym, (yes, I use to work out) and one of the fitness instructors happened to catch my eye. She was this knock out blonde that stood about five foot three. She had green eyes that could soothe a charging bear, and her laugh was like the whispers of angels from above. Well after a couple of days of planning in my head how I was going to ask her out. I finally worked up enough nerve and walked over to her and asked her straight out, as best as I could, if she would like to go to the movies with me sometime. To my shock she said yes! But my mind didn’t register the “yes” part,. She had a way of looking at me that made me squirm a little. It was as if she knew something about me and expected an explanation.The rational side of me knew this was only my self-centered fear speaking to me while the emotional (read irrational) side of me knew with a certainty that I'd been found out. She could see my licentious thoughts written across my face. And with good reason. At a later stage in my life I figured out why I felt guilty so often. Usually I *was*!You see, Gerry was a knockout, a sex bomb. She had a fantastic figure with prominent breasts and a nice jutting butt. She had a habit of reaching with her right hand, under her left breast into her left arm pit as she was talking with me. This served to push her breast up and in, accenting the visible cleavage. I was powerless; I had to stare. Often, I suspected, she didn't wear a bra. Sometimes when I'd give her a hug, I'd be sure of it. She was chief among my illusionary women and an active masturbation fantasy. Her.
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